Lonely at Uni? 5 Ways To Make Friends

Written by Nicola Wylie
developingastudent

Are you lonely at uni? You’re not alone. In fact, a recent study found that 23% of students reported experiencing regular feelings of loneliness. While feeling lonely during your first few months at university is completely normal, it can take its toll on your mental health. Fortunately, there are plenty of ways to tackle loneliness and make friends at uni. 

We’ve broken down everything you need to know about tackling loneliness and making friends at university.  

Why Students Feel Lonely At Uni

There are several reasons why so many university students report feeling lonely at uni. For example:

  • Living away from family, friends, and the security of home life for the first time
  • Struggling to settle into a new living arrangement such as student halls or a shared flat
  • Pressures of university work
  • If you’re living at home, you may feel like you’re missing out on the full university experience
  • Feeling shy and struggling to make new friends

Now let’s look at how to combat loneliness.

Feeling Lonely At Uni? Here’s How To Tackle It

We’ve put together some advice to help you tackle feeling lonely at uni. 

Speak Up

We all feel lonely at some point in our lives, but persistent feelings of isolation should be addressed. If you are struggling to settle into university life or feel like your mental health is suffering, it’s important to reach out to someone. 

When we feel lonely, it’s easy to withdraw even further, making the situation worse. If you feel isolated, the best thing you can do is to talk to someone about how you’re feeling. We recommend talking to a trusted friend or family member first. Alternatively, try sharing how you’re feeling with a flatmate or friend on campus. 

If you don’t have anyone you feel comfortable opening up to, try speaking to a professional. Organisations such as studentminds.org support students with their mental health and offer well-being tips and access to trusted support.  

Start Small

If you’re shy or feeling overwhelmed at the idea of making new friends, break it down into small steps. For example, set yourself a realistic goal of inviting a flatmate or someone on your course for a coffee. As you build your confidence and start getting to know your peers, you can take bigger steps such as joining a club or arranging a night out. The key is to take small steps and give yourself time to connect with a small circle of people first. 

Lean On Your Family and Close Circle

Living away from home for the first time can be lonely. However, remember that your loved ones are just a phone call away. Make an effort to speak with your close circle regularly, they will pick you up when you are feeling down. 

Get Into a Routine

Starting uni is a shock to the system. When you’re at school, you have a strict schedule in your days, but at university, you have to manage your own time. One of the best ways to settle into uni life and look after your emotional well-being is to set a routine. For example, create a schedule and stick to it. This should include when you go to the gym, buy groceries, do your laundry, and clean your dorm room. 

Of course, meeting new people is one of the best ways to deal with loneliness. So, we’ve broken down our 5 favourite tips for making friends at uni.

6 Tips For Making Friends At Uni

Meeting new people can be overwhelming whether you’re an extrovert or an introvert. However, it’s important to remember that everyone is in the same boat. Even if it doesn’t seem like it, you’ll find that almost everyone around you is feeling shy and nervous. So, don’t be afraid to smile and strike up a conversation.

To help you, we’ve compiled some advice on how to make friends at uni. 

1. Get to Know the People on Your Course

The great thing about getting to know the people on your course is that there are plenty of talking points to break the nice. Plus, you know that you are interested in the same subject. Striking up a conversation at your lecture could be as easy as asking to borrow a pen, double-checking the meaning of something, or simply starting a chat about what your lecturer discussed. 

Once you’ve made a few friends on your course, you will feel more confident going to your lectures. What’s more, they may introduce you to other people to expand your social circle.

2. Make Friends With Your Flatmates

If you’re living in student accommodation, making friends with your flatmates will greatly improve your student experience. Start by being friendly, smiling in the hallways, and leaving your door open. That way, people will feel more comfortable peeking their heads around the door for a quick chat. It’s also a good idea to spend time in the common areas to get to know your new flatmates.  If you’re shy, try bringing some sweets or biscuits to share or offer them a cup of team.

While your flatmates may not end up being your best friends, having a friendly relationship will make for a more comfortable experience.

3. Connect on Social Media Social Media

Social media is a fantastic way to meet fellow students. As such, you should consider joining social media groups on Facebook or Reddit before starting uni. You’ll find groups for people living in the same halls as you, on your course, or interested in the same hobbies as you. Getting to know some people virtually before you arrive will make the transition easier and offer a new network of friends to lean on.

You could even organise a group to attend welcome parties during fresher’s week. Fresher’s week is one of the best ways to meet new people, so try to get involved. Check out our survival guide for freshers’ week 2022 for the lowdown on how to make the most of it.

4. Join Clubs and Societies

Almost all universities offer a wide range of societies, such as sports, languages, or culture. As such, they are an easy way to connect with like-minded people. While societies are fantastic for making friends, we recommend not overdoing it. Instead, pick one or two that you are really interested in and try to make deep connections with a handful of people. Oftentimes, having a small circle of close friends will combat loneliness better than 20 acquaintances. 

5. Find a Part-Time Student Job

Finding a part-time student job will give you some extra pocket money to cover uni costs. In addition, it will offer you a great way to meet new people. Making friends at work is easier because you are working in a team and have a reason to talk to your colleagues. On top of that, you take your breaks together or attend social events after work. 

We suggest waiting until you have settled into your classes and gotten your schedule before taking on a part-time job. If you’re worried about juggling working with uni, many part-time student jobs only consist of Saturday work, giving you the rest of the week to study during the week.

Our live jobs board for students and graduates is packed with opportunities in your area. In addition, we offer valuable resources, such as CV writing tips and advice on selling your skills.

6. Don’t Forget about Erasmus Students

It’s common for Erasmus students to feel lonely when they first start university. Not only are they starting a new university, but they are also moving to a brand new country. As such, they will need even more support settling in. Strike up a conversation with Erasmus students on your course or in your halls and offer them support. It’s a wonderful chance to meet new people from a different culture.

Final Thoughts

Feeling lonely at uni is perfectly normal. While some people settle in immediately, for others, it takes longer. If you are feeling lonely, remember that you aren’t alone. Many other people are in the same boat, so be patient and give yourself time. Make sure that you reach out to your support network and seek support if the feelings persist. 

Looking for your dream job? Be sure to check out our dedicated Student and Graduate Jobs Board for fantastic opportunities in your area.

Our website has a wealth of valuable resources for students and graduates, including CV writing tips and advice on writing an impactful cover letter. If you have specific questions, feel free to contact us or sign up for the free Developing a Student email newsletter with the form below.   

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Last Updated: Monday July 24 2023
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